When using direct response copy, be personal where possible. Try and avoid "the manager" approach. "Hello John Smith" is more personal and people like to see their names.
I am about to set up a clothing label, is there any website links or info available for people setting up a business for the first time? Also i`ve been told about a type of copywrite where you can post everything you want to be copywritten to yourself through recorded delivery, is this true?